my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Randomize
