Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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