update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
