I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
