Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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