party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
