There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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