Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
