CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Randomize
