There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
