it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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