I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
