you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Randomize
