I feel like I'm in dance class right now
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
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