Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
