An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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