He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
