a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Randomize
