don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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