VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
