I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
