Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Randomize
