its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize