we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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