i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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