but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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