I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
