the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
