And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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