Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize
