its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I came so hard my ears popped.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
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