I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
