So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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