We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
