I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
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