He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize