Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize