I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
