also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Randomize
