I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
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