Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize