Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Randomize
