East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Randomize
