you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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