I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
