woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
