every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Randomize
