Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
