I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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