his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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