My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
